Posted by

Posted by posted in Poker Journals


Iv'e been interested in posting a little summery about myself on this site, so I figured on this cold, windy, rainy Upstate New York night, why not start now?

I'm 28 years old and I've been playing poker over the last few years. Out of the group of friends I have, I'm the only one who truly enjoys the game and is interested at consistently improving my play. After the here and there little games my friends and I played at our homes, I branched out and decided to try out the live felt at a Casino near by. I stuck with what I was familiar with which was No Limit and sat down at a 1/2 NL table buying in for the minimum of $50. After a couple hours I left the table with $300, a $250 profit with hardly any true knowledge of how to play correctly. As I cashed out I told myself that if I put in the time off the felt to study the game and take this a little more seriously, maybe I could turn this little hobby of mine into a profitable side-venture.

As the time went on, I would study by reading numerous strategy books and watch strategy YouTube videos and overall just log more hours on the felt, both live and online. I was getting good and I was following all of the straight-forward necessary steps in order to succeed as a solid poker player including proper bankroll management and emotional control. When I began my journey grinding my way up, I started with a small 4 figure sum. A couple years later it turned into mid-size 5 figure sum. A few months after that it all disappeared.

Throughout the early stages of my journey I was completely disciplined. I clocked in at a certain time, I brought a specific roll amount with me each time depending on the day and overall I just wasn't careless. From what I can remember, I was sitting at a slow-paced 2/5 NL table feeling pretty bored and got up from the table for a break to walk around. For some reason the slots looked appealing to me that day and coming from a person who's never played one until that exact day, I was curious. I deposited $100 into the machine and close to an hour later I won $1000 ($900 profit). When I look back on that experience now, I wish it never took place.

As time passed my poker playing became a lot more loose and I was taking shots at stakes I couldn't afford to play at and if I did good or bad at the poker tables I would head to the pits shortly after to see if I can up the score a little more. I was also eating terribly during this time making my mind even more clouded. All of this snowballing to a point that everything I put effort into diligently in the beginning would eventually explode and it did.

Where I'm at currently is a person who loves the game of poker and one who has potential to once again be a solid player. I guess you can say at this point that I am picking my spots in order to fully capitalize. Throughout the years I've been dealing with severe depression and anxiety. Within this I've encountered different combinations of medicines to help ease the condition although sometimes certain medications make things even worse. As of now, I'm getting off of what hasn't been helping me to a combination that can suit me better, hopefully.

I would imagine it's possible for a person who deals with depression and anxiety to still be a solid poker player. I have to keep thinking about the long-term of getting better because playing poker makes me happy, (Well, not all the time because losing stinks) and I've always wanted it to be a part-time job for me. Overall I do enjoy the game very much. All and all, I just would like to start over once again when ready because I believe I've learned from my mistakes and the next time around I'll be a little more wiser in my approach.

Best of luck to everyone out there trying their best to achieving their goals. It's 1 day at a time.

Loading 9 Comments...

Be the first to add a comment

You must upgrade your account to leave a comment.

This thread has been locked. No further comments can be added. uses cookies to give you the best experience. Learn more about our Cookie Policy