I have created a journal in the past but failed to keep up with it but this year I'm going to keep up with it as i feel like i have grown as a person and a player. Last year i experienced immense growth a player due being a member of RIO i was playing 2NL and loosing i kept deleting databases and starting over had serious chase your losses syndrome i was just an all round Degen who felt entitled to beat micros as time past i was invited to a discord group which would change my life and my poker journey i started studying with players that where better than me and they coached me and showed me i was a huge fish with no fundamentals just want to give a shout out to @RunItTw1ce HawksWin CrappyTimeSlot i have these 3 to thank for changing my game RunItTw1ce Coached me one on one and was instrumental in my development Crappy thanks for your PowerPoint and Hawks AKA the database wizard helped me understand stats and exploits.
There is more i ended up loosing my roll after this because of mindset issues and decided to take a break from poker entirely so for 2 months i did and in that time i worked hard on my mindset reading books meditation and just taking a break helped all be it a long one, but i had never even took a day off in the past and didn't realize but i suffered for burn out. so anyways after two months i deposited £10 and ran it up to $90 gambling essentially my real deposit date was a couple weeks off lost most of the $90 playing short deck which also i had issues with just playing one game i.e. NLH cash so i had $26 left and entered a few MTT's entered a 3max Turbo KO on Christmas Eve finished 4th for $75 total then on boxing day the day after Christmas finished 3rd for $145 in the same MTT then finished 8th for $56 in the micro Monday 6max a day later so my roll was at like $280. ended up loosing 10BI playing my nemesis short deck AGAIN
That's when everything changed for me internally see in the past i had tried around 11 times to move up in stakes for 2NL to 5NL failing every time so i stopped playing went outside and give my self a pep talk and said Reece you are not going to fail again this time it felt different i was a much stronger player technically from all the coaching and studying i had done but you wanna piss away Buyins on games like short deck don't be that guy anymore and for the next week i played 12k hands and I'm up 16.5BI at 5NL zoom and have not played short deck since i take regular breaks and approach poker in a more professional way as you can see it has taken time to adjust i have been bluff catching to much and had to overcome my mental block of moving up stakes after failing 11 times but never give up it is possible and just remember we are doing well at life if we can play poker no matter the stake so be grateful be kind to yourself and work hard peace everyone HAPPY NEW YEAR